I didn’t build a lighthouse on purpose
Don’t start construction inside me
Because I know you won’t
Have the patience to understand
The ecology of my mind
To sit down
To untangle my thoughts
Thread by thread
Dear you might end up dead
It’s cold in here
But only when you’re close
I won’t even let you try
Shut your ears
Close your eyes
Keep on drifting by
Browsing category: Poetry
Dreamweaver
I have ideas
About the chapters in my book
And sometimes I make plans
But the best storyteller I know
The skilled dream weaver
Artist of life
Veil of secrets
Is the universe
The ultimate creator
And destroyer
That force you feel mixing in the air
Wondering which way
The magic will blow
Girl, They Don’t Know Your Worth
Girl, They Don’t Know Your Worth
LISTEN
I promise you
That it’s getting better
Imagine driving
Thinking
Daydreaming
In LOVE
With some one new
With your life
With yourself
And realize
You are HAPPY
And not only happy
But astonishingly BLESSED
It’s all come together
Whoever hurt you
Is waking up today
At the same time
Realizing
How much better it used to be
When you were around
You are the light
The lavender fields
The volcano sunsets
That keep the rest of us going
You are hope
Don’t waste ANY time
Feeling sad about those
Who are infested with demons
Who are BLIND
You shine
You helped them more than you know
And the only reason
They made you feel low
Is because
You’re up
I was literally driving today on my way to teach yoga and realized that my present is so much better than my past. I was so happy that I felt bitter because of how I had allowed myself to be made to feel so low.
I kept saying yes to the wrong people and getting tangled up in the wrong situations over and over again. Until I hit the lowest of the lows: the breaking point: the self intervention: the collapse into despair.
It has been one year of processing through my own inner demons that was triggered, realizing that I am worth much more than the people around me were treating me as and saying NO over and over again because I am not going to take whatever I can get. I deserve to have my heart be cherished.
This poem was inspired by things people have said to me, things I’ve said to myself, and things I want to say to any woman whose worth has not been fully realized by the people around her.
Stay blessed x
Just Words
For those who have convinced me with their words when I was too naive to wait for their actions . . .
Emotions are disabled.
Dull in the eyes and slippery on the skin. Tragedy and sunlight. Everything rolls across without a moment to soak in.
I can barely hear their heartbeat. Not even a stomach rumble for the future. Too afraid to hold anything tight.
But what about me– I draped them in affection. I shined over them like quartz.
Their thick of thorns locked away the rain and I don’t know how to claw my way through a cactus without bleeding.
Jagged breath kisses. Locked jaws. Read but no reply. Dialogue with the mind instead of the heart. Sticky words in a web of contradictions.
They painted beautiful sceneries with air. They hooked cords into me and snatched them away once they became bored of tasting my light. Once they realized that I wasn’t going to fix them and the idea of fixing themselves . . . too challenging.
Wake up little dandelions. Let them sink themselves to the bottom of the ocean. Alone.
Karmic Love
Spiders are crawling out of my eyes. There are cactuses knotted in my hair. I haven’t showered in 6 days. There’s food on the floor and daddy roaches are slithering around for scraps. I saw an ant get eaten by another ant. I’m dreaming about sucking on your tongue and swallowing your morning breath. I’m nasty filthy longing for you. I thought you would stay, but all you do is walk away.
Stardust
The moments and stars are in tune. Our thoughts and actions click into each other like peaceful dreams. Blades of grass and the hairs on our head, like our spirits, are always growing even though they appear to be stagnant.
It takes a year to understand all that is contained in a day. It takes reflection to read yourself clearly. Passing thoughts with thorough contemplation reveals answers you thought only a fine tuned psychic could tell you.
We are puzzle pieces that fit together and fall apart in the same soggy moment. It is important to see these changes, wrap them in suede and tuck them inside you. Be thankful. Every adversity and splash of bad luck has brought you to this present moment equally as much as a heavenly stroke of divine intervention.
People cannot return to you the gifts you have poured onto them from your heart because not everyone has the same heart as you. Not everyone has your same eyes or breath and that is what makes us individuals. You are you because of you so do not tangle when I am not you because I am I. Thank everyone for their own unique essence. Their vibration is a contribution to this mystical universe.
Love as heavy as you can. Eat love, sleep with it, throw it at people like stones through glass windows. We all need love and it does not cause you any debt to hand it out.
Prince of Deceit
Empty chest
Filled with can’ts
Stars in his eyes
Tongue like sand
Long Distance
Our bodies split
By the vastness of the world
While our souls
Hold hands
Completion
She waits for it
Like a child in a deep sleep
Aware that morning will come
Tucked quietly in the darkness
Dreaming
Certain of the sun
Anatomy of a Tree
I am hurt
But I feel rooted
My spirit doesn’t float on a flimsy string
It is a thick tree
Inside my ribs
Spreading tall to my eyes
But its limbs are shaking in my stomach
Wind whipping in my head
I’m tired
I’m dizzy
Fallen leaves all around
I wait for them to rot
And turn themselves into soil
That breeds something else
It is better to have a storm
Than an apocalypse
To burst away
Before I crawled too tightly into the cookie cutter
I am strong
I am shaken
I am allowed to be both
It hurts to walk away from you, but my intuition told me that I should.
I am so honored that you’re here.
