The moments and stars are in tune. Our thoughts and actions click into each other like peaceful dreams. Blades of grass and the hairs on our head, like our spirits, are always growing even though they appear to be stagnant.
It takes a year to understand all that is contained in a day. It takes reflection to read yourself clearly. Passing thoughts with thorough contemplation reveals answers you thought only a fine tuned psychic could tell you.
We are puzzle pieces that fit together and fall apart in the same soggy moment. It is important to see these changes, wrap them in suede and tuck them inside you. Be thankful. Every adversity and splash of bad luck has brought you to this present moment equally as much as a heavenly stroke of divine intervention.
People cannot return to you the gifts you have poured onto them from your heart because not everyone has the same heart as you. Not everyone has your same eyes or breath and that is what makes us individuals. You are you because of you so do not tangle when I am not you because I am I. Thank everyone for their own unique essence. Their vibration is a contribution to this mystical universe.
Love as heavy as you can. Eat love, sleep with it, throw it at people like stones through glass windows. We all need love and it does not cause you any debt to hand it out.
I have noticed that self-care and self-love have become an issue of neglect for us humans. I want to share all the little things that I do to nourish myself and what I experience when I lose track of things. If you have low-energy, feel lost, or stressed, it could be because you are not taking care of some aspect of yourself.
Below is what I do to take care of myself.
My Space / Environment
When my room is cluttered, it means that my mind is cluttered or it is about to be. It is important to keep my space organized and tidy at all times. This means putting away my clothes as soon as I try on another outfit (life of a girl), making sure everything is folded and in its correct spot, setting my bed every morning, taking out the trash, doing dishes immediately, and getting rid of things as soon as I realize that I do not need them (recycle, give-away).
I loved living out of my backpack while traveling because I had less items to keep track of.
I also love to light incense, sage, and use essential oils to keep the atmosphere clear and smelling good. I open the windows and prefer to have natural light.
I love to exercise my mind by researching different topics that I am interested in (health, astrology, yoga). I read poetry. I also love reading up on psychological and sociological studies on the internet. I try to give my brain information so that it does not stagnate. Learning new languages and trying new skills helps this, but it is not a daily task for me.
I also turn to meditation if I am having trouble overthinking and worrying. If this does not solve the situation, I write. I go to my journal and begin a stream of consciousness to get down to the root of my issue. I find that there are lots of things I need to get out that I did not realize were hiding inside me. If I have not written in a while or taken the time to sort out my thoughts, I will feel it as clutter in my head, rumination, confusion, and feeling lost.Read More
I feel like I want to reach out to something. To remove this suffocating blanket, but I can’t figure out how to do it. I wish there was somewhere that I could go or some one that I could call. But there is no where and no one who can satisfy the longing. I want it to be you and I want it to be here, but everything has settled like freshly laid bricks. I am lost in all the gray shades of a rainy sky again. Why is it that I always have to want more? To be stimulated. To be climbing a limitless height. I did know all along that this was never the final destination and home is not a place that I can travel to.
Home is within me. But sometimes I have so many mood swings and fluctuations of feelings that I feel like I am in the middle of a storm or deserted in a white space. Sometimes I feel off and every person around me feels like a puzzle piece that doesn’t quite fit.
I still see the beauty in the little things. Like fallen flowers on the pavement and the sound of the wind. But I am wanting more from life. A thick purpose. A project that flows like a dance.
I don’t know how my spirit can be so needy. Always craving changes and chasing the future. Sometimes, I wish that I could be a simpler human. Do one thing, live in one place, have a routine, smile through it all, and wake up happy. Like a farmer who spends their summers weeding and their winters inside reading books.
Maybe I can be like this when I am older. But, for now, I am seeking. I am complicated. I am searching for ripe fruits. I look at other complicated women and think how difficult it is to be around them. To try and break through their layers knowing that there are more than I could ever know about. There are stories sewed into their being that I could never understand. But I understand because I am also a woman like this.
There is always something mixing inside me. A light blooming. A darkness leaking. I am unpredictable and free, yet caged and lost. But I am here. I am alive. I want to keep breathing. Some days I am high and some days I am low. Just keep going. That’s all I have to worry about. Be open to opportunities if they come, but for now, just keep on top of the daily tasks and enjoy.
I am so honored that you’re here.
Hi, my name is Allyson. Traveling is my passion. Healing others is my purpose. Writing is my therapy.