• The Two Seedlings

    It was a thoroughly confusing time. We felt so lost. It became dark and it was difficult to see the string that held our hearts together. We didn’t know how to navigate without breaking apart. Without hurting each other.

    There were some things that were necessary for us to realize. But we had to do it apart.

    It caused a lot of pain. But the pain taught us something. We learned how to grow into our own spirit.

    So, we grew like seeds and broke through the dirt despite all that weighed us down. And, now, we are blossoming. Now, we have even deeper roots to ground us.

    We are each other’s sun and rain. We help each other.

    Finally, we are finding our way back to intertwine. It is a special feeling to know that the storm has passed and we are side by side again. To know that no matter the damage, nothing can stop what is meant to be.

    We are stronger together, but, now, we know how strong we can be on our own too.

  • Why Do I Feel Guilty? – H O M E S I C K N E S S

    You want to see the world, but that means leaving the people you love, your comforts, stability, familiarity, and routines. For me, this is exactly the reason to explore new horizons: for the change, excitement, and novelty. In fact, new places and new people draw me away.

    There have been many instances where homesickness has seeped into my blood stream. Usually when things aren’t going smoothly or there is something exciting going on at home. Please note, difficult times always pass, holidays and birthdays pass, and home becomes boring again. Everything changes.

    I have three younger brothers: ages 5, 8, and 19 years old. I am the oldest sister, but I am never around. I am always half way across the world. The 19-year-old and I mostly communicate to each other by sending memes on Instagram. I can’t even directly communicate with the youngest two. I told my Dad to tell them that I said Goodnight and I love you one evening and he replied that the youngest forgot who I was. I hope that’s not true, but it shatters my heart.

    I am guilty of not being around for my brothers. There will always be times when they need me, but I am not there. Interestingly, I am a kindergarten teacher, surrounded by young children, teaching them and giving them my love, yet I don’t do this for the two children whom I share a father with.

    How do I deal with this guilt?

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